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Who do I speak to about a transfer to a better species?
@CrypticMirror Send that information over here once you find it. 
@georgetakei
"Man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much—the wheel, New York, wars and so on—whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man—for precisely the same reasons."
(Douglas Adams)
@georgetakei bears have a nice life, except for all the people wanting to shoot them
@georgetakei I realize it's just a joke but, in the interest of accuracy, it's my mom, not scientists, who says that.
@potpie @georgetakei Scientists say that all lifeforms are equally evolved, all of them billions of years away from the last common ancestor, no matter whether they're still single cells or very complex organisms. Evolution has no goal and no direction, it's just random mutations and natural selection. Every living organism, whether bacterium, plant, animal, or whatever, comes from those that managed to survive and procreate.
@LordCaramac @potpie @georgetakei either that or the most evolved organism is probably some form of bacterium that has had more generations of ancestors than any other.