Now... If I understand the #Narnia allegory correctly. Today we celebrate the rising of #Jesus and him subsequently ripping #PontiusPilate's face off with his teeth. Right?
Who knew Jesus was a #FloridaMan?
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#floridaman
4 posts4 participants0 posts today
@MusiqueNow My #FloridaBoycott continues. I’m not spending any of my hard earned cash over there. Neither am I using any of my precious vacation time. It’s not safe. #FloridaMan #RepublicansHateYou
It has been __0__ days since a #Republican was outed as a sex offender.
WKMG News 6 & ClickOrlando · Former DeSantis spokesman arrested for allegedly exposing sex organs
Today's #FloridaMan story. And yes, again, that IS his real name according to sources.
> Knife-wielding Florida man with last name ‘Cocaine’ arrested after allegedly attacking Subway employees with ‘bad attitudes’ https://nypost.com/2025/04/15/us-news/florida-man-with-last-name-cocaine-arrested-after-allegedly-attacking-subway-employees-with-bad-attitudes/
New York Post · Knife-wielding Florida man with last name 'Cocaine' arrested after allegedly attacking Subway employees with 'bad attitudes'
"Cocaine became so irate"
Cocaine can do WHAT now???
WKMG News 6 & ClickOrlando · ‘Cocaine became so irate:’ Man attacked Brevard County Subway employees, deputies say
He was arrested. Apparently, being drunk in public might not be a good thing. That and wearing a pink thong. That doesn't help. Oh, and I suppose wearing fake breasts kinda made things worse. The pink wig? Probably didn't help things.
https://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster/applebees/thong-man-275830
The Smoking GunCops Bust Drunk Man Wearing Pink Thong, Fake Breasts, Pink Wig
Sir, this is an Applebee’s.
A drunk man wearing a pink wig, fake breasts, and a pink thong was arrested Friday evening for causing a disturbance outside the chain restaurant, where concerned diners h
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_GwlQKycZw oh boy that #jupiter " #florida #floridaman #maga - #mentalhealth in toilet aka #reality check please ~ wow great job conservatives.. ffs #failure ' built in .. ? #palmbeach breach'
ALT
Heard through a friend:
`Kid Rock is Michigan's own "FloridaMan"`
I guess Mike Waltz really is The Florida Man! #MikeWaltz #leaks #floridaman
Today's #FloridaMan story.
> ‘I don’t f—ing care’: Florida man allegedly ‘became upset’ about music during karaoke night and pointed his gun at another bar patron https://lawandcrime.com/crime/i-dont-f-ing-care-florida-man-allegedly-became-upset-about-music-during-karaoke-night-and-pointed-his-gun-at-another-bar-patron/
Law & Crime · Florida man allegedly 'became upset' about music during karaoke night and took his gun outOutside, in front of the bar, another patron was smoking. The smoker then spoke with the defendant in an attempt to calm him down, according to the affidavit. But he apparently could not be consoled.
Watching 
#Texas stupid itself into extinction has been actually more fun this year than #FloridaMan so, +1 to the 1-star state!
"Orlando police officer tracks down, returns lost stuffed animal to 6-year-old girl at airport"
A rare #FloridaMan post that doesn't suck donkey balls.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/orlando-police-officer-tracks-down-returns-lost-stuffed-animal-to-6-year-old-girl-at-airport/ar-AA1BkY0K
www.msn.comMSN
"Man Wearing "I Never Argue" T-Shirt Busted For Violent Argument With Woman"
https://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster/battery/never-argue-bust-316258
The Smoking GunMan Wearing "I Never Argue" T-Shirt Busted For Violent Argument With Woman
A man wearing a t-shirt declaring “I Never Argue” was arrested yesterday when an argument with a female acquaintance turned violent, police report.
Daniel Murillo, 44, is accused of repeatedly punchi
Florida man raises alligator & names it spot
.
https://youtube.com/shorts/ObqYw10ajfk?si=xJK4vaQgNJ0uf9fT
.
#Florida #FloridaMan #alligator
#FloridaMan being Florida Man. The bacteria was so rare it took doctors 2 years to figure it out. 
> Florida man eats feral pig meat, contracts rare biothreat bacteria https://arstechnica.com/health/2025/03/florida-man-eats-feral-pig-meat-contracts-rare-biothreat-bacteria/
Ars Technica · Florida man eats feral pig meat, contracts rare biothreat bacteria
Note that #FloridaMan does not waste his beer.
> Florida man takes joyride in stolen ambulance, then finishes beer before taken into custody: Cops https://lawandcrime.com/crime/florida-man-takes-joyride-in-stolen-ambulance-then-finishes-beer-before-taken-into-custody-cops/
Law & Crime · Florida man takes joyride in stolen ambulance, finishes beer before taken into custody: CopsA Florida man who was apparently upset he wasn't receiving a free ride home from the hospital decided to steal an ambulance and lead cops on a police chase, according to troopers.
Woman calls 911 after the pizza delivery driver refused to deliver the pizza. Evidently, the live alligator on the driveway was a bit much.
https://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2025/03/13/pizza-alligator-Bradenton-Florida/2671741881859/
UPI · Watch: Police officer steps in when alligator blocks pizza delivery in Florida - UPI.com